Parents!

My kids and family uber alles! The rest of the world simply has to deal! Right?

Please keep an eye on your kids. I have rescued children on 3 occasions, after they ran into the driveway almost getting hit by cars. One woman yelled at me: "Stay away from my kid!" Sure Ma'am, its just that calling the ambulance, morgue and then writing the report is too much work for the guard. Besides, I hate the screaming afterward too.

Remember if you discipline your kids they might become good citizens, but don't constrain their natural animalistic freedom!

I especially like cleaning up when your hellions grab all the advertizing brochures and throw them in the air. At which point you smile at them, so cute, glare at me!

When your kids give you a nice gift but you know they have no money, no job and no good friends and they tell you they bought it or found it...remember that they in fact stole it.

Leaving your kids in front of the store, asking them to be quiet and behave...is simply not going to work. Does it work at home?

The guard is NOT your baby sitter! or your boogeyman with which to scare your kids.

Leaving your stroller in the main entrance might upset the cart.

Telling your kids to "go play in the store" is not good parenting, it is just laziness.